Hey guys!
You know I like doing mental health Wednesday posts, so it is perfect that Bell's Let's Talk day falls exactly today. There is such a stigma associated around mental health, because people assume its "all in our head". What people do not understand is that is can physically hurt, Anxiety physically hurts (panic attacks, hello?) and Depression hurts so much the only way to get a piece of mind is to physically hurt ourselves. I understand, I have first class experience in this, and talking about it is so insanely difficult. People assume you are weak. People don't look at you the same way again, and nothing can change that. Physical pain doesn't last long, mental pain lasts too long. And yes to answer earlier's statement, it is in our heads. That is exactly why we need to talk about it. To get it out of ours heads. Whether you have someone you can trust with your life, or you literally talk to yourself in the mirror. Letting the words flow, and sharing your problems, is a problem halved.
I want to keep this post lighthearted and like a normal chat, because that is exactly how mental health should be.
I recently went on a long girly day out, and took so many steps forward Anxiety wise. I was so happy I had managed to conquer a day like this with minimal Anxiety. I can barely order my own food without rehearsing it in my head four million times, let alone go out to lunch with friends. It sounds so mundane, but it was a big accomplishment for me. I celebrate the small victories :)
This was a long day out for me, and I actually managed to enjoy all of it. The first thing we did was play glow in the dark crazy golf. I have done this many times before with my family, but never one-on-one with a friend. It was actually so freaking fun! And I won :) But in true Zoë fashion, we had to take a few (and by a few I mean a lot) of photos. Honestly I would pay to go in and just take photos at this place, so photogenic! But I actually had so much fun, and the place was dead. It was literally just us two the entire time, which is perfect for an anxious-wreck-of-a-person like me :)
Now this was the hardest part of the day, going out to lunch. Now I so nearly said "we could just eat at the cinema" (which is where we were heading next), but I didn't. Emily insisted on eating at East Side Marios's (we were right next to it, it was cold, I couldn't be asked question her), which is somewhere I have never been. The thought of eating out, alone generally makes me anxious, being with just a friend (and having to be a big girl, sh*t me), is worse. Eating somewhere I have never eaten before, is a nightmare. I have a problem with eating, (but I would rather not get into that right now) so I was seriously freaking out. As soon as I saw pizza on the menu however, I instantly calmed down. I was going to be alright (thank heavens). We ate lunch, Emily took photos, I took photos, we laughed, we had fun. I actually enjoyed myself. Another win for me :)
Finally, the cinema. This was the main reason we were actually out together, as we had been planning on seeing Pitch Perfect 3 together for a while. I had already seen the movie once, but it was so good I was not going to turn down an opportunity to see it again! It was just as good as the first time, and I would go and see it a third time! (literally the best one of all the pitch perfects!)
That was the gist of our day out. Lots of little victories, lots of laughter, lots of smiling. Lots of living in the moment, and just being happy. Lots of conquering little things I could only dream of this time last year. Lots of little things for the memory bank. Lots, lots, lots (okay I'm done now ;).
I actually filmed this whole day out on my Youtube channel, as my first ever A Day In The Life so that I could remember all the happy things, and everything I managed to conquer that day!
Just your regular old mental health chat. Anxiety has been something I have struggled with for so long, but I NEED to start moving forward with it. This was my first step, and to me it was a big one. Stay strong, you were put on this planet for a reason, and guess what? You haven't found out what that reason is yet. Something amazing is going to happen for every single person on this planet, don't miss it.
Hustle Hard Girl,
Hustle Hard Girl,